Connections in the Online Landscape

     Using Knapp's relationship model, I'm going to share how I made a friend 9 years ago, who I still keep in touch with today, and even traveled halfway across the world to meet.

    Our initiation phase started when we saw each other's profiles on a language exchange app. She was looking to learn English and I was looking to learn Mandarin Chinese with an interest in learning Korean in the future, and she spoke both. I don't remember which one of us reached out to the other, but our language goals were compatible, so we started talking.

    We started practicing with each other, getting to know each other and using the language skills we'd developed so far to hold basic conversations. When one of us made a mistake, the other would correct them. We both gained knowledge in our target languages and information about one another. 

    Korean speaking has a formal language, used for people older or those you don't know well. We decided to drop honorifics after getting to know each other better when speaking Korean. This was during the phase where we'd gotten a bit more comfortable with each other.

    We became close friends, talking to each other often and decided to use an app other than the language exchanging platform to talk. The apps we've used have changed a lot over the years but some that we have used have been KakaoTalk, WeChat, Whatsapp, and Instagram. We'd talk about our friendship to our other friends and family as well.

    I'd say we'd "bonded" once we started sending physical letters and packages to one another. She lived in China at the time that we were mailing each other things, and unfortunately a lot of the letters and packages we'd sent never arrived, but sometimes they did! But this showed that we trusted one another enough to share our physical locations with the other.

    Last year, I traveled for 6 months. She lives in South Korea now and I decided that I would spend a few weeks there to stop in and meet her in-person for the first time in our 8-years (now 9) of friendship. We did a lot of activities together, and to both of our surprise, we actually didn't feel awkward at all! We'd both thought that it would feel strange to see each other or that we may be different than we'd expected, but we both had a great time.

    Here's a short video I made and posted onto my YouTube channel that includes some thinsg we did together. I had permission from her to include her in the video, so I'm happy to share with you all!
Bus Adventure in Seoul, South Korea

The Pros & Cons of Social Media and the Loneliness We Face

    Social networking sites certainly have a wide range of benefits and drawbacks. I think most of Generation Z is aware of the amazing things social media has brought to us, while also aware that there are some negative effects. Social media has allowed people to become more connected than ever. This, in many ways, is a good thing. It allows us to stay up-to-date on the lives of our loved ones no matter the distance between one another. Another benefit is allowing people to be exposed to people who are different from them. Not everyone has the luxury of living in a diverse area, so many people are able to learn more about cultural and lifestyle differences through social media platforms. It, for those who are willing, allows people to become more open-minded about the different ways people live and the struggles they face.

    Another benefit is that many people have been able to find a sense of community online. For example, I grew up in a very small town and I've always had obscure interests, such as raising betta fish, world geography, travel, and other cultures. In school, I wasn't able to meet many people I could connect with on such things, but the internet and social media helped bring me together with those who also were excited about the same things as myself. Additionally, it helped to expand my knowledge and perspectives on such topics.

    But that doesn't mean social media is all good. A lot of people have become addicted to it-- not only younger generations but even older ones. The issue is that many people don't see the issue with continuously checking one's phone at a dinner or social gathering because it has become so normalized that social media is a part of our daily lives. Yet, this behavior is a clear sign of dependence on one's device and hinders real-life social interaction. While I said that it can help to build communities online, it can also damage real-life connections if one is not careful. I will be honest and say that I definitely am on social media more than I'd like to be, but one thing I am good about is putting my phone away while in the company of others. However, many of the people in my life struggle with this. We could be having a serious conversation and they constantly glance at their device, or having a dinner where it would be wonderful to have a conversation, but they're too busy watching videos on their phone. I think, for both sides, this could be an attribute to the loneliness epidemic currently being faced (which you can learn about more in-depth and see additional correlations between social media and loneliness here). While one side struggles to connect because the other is on their device, the one on their device is too dependent on social media to form deep real-world connections. 

    Another issue that may arise is that some people seek validation through online posts rather than finding ways to validate themselves alone or through other means. This can also lead to being dependent on social media, but also, it has become easier than ever to become dependent on the ideas of others. Not that this didn't exist before, but now the opinions of some strangers who may not know anything about the poster are highlighted more. This can also lead to a decline in mental health if the responses to a post are not up to the standards the poster had wished for (ie. like count) or if harmful comments or messages are left on it.

Photo // Rawpixel Ltd.

    However, despite this, I don't exactly believe it is a social media platform's job to promote mental health among users. At least, not more than most already do. I absolutely agree with having guidelines for what can be posted to prevent gore-media and sensitive, triggering posts to be made. I also agree with being able to block and report those who may be harassing someone on social media. But I believe those are the general rule of thumb for most online platforms. With social media addiction, as I discussed earlier, at the end of the day it is each individual's responsibility to maintain a healthy balance. Just like how someone can drink alcohol but not be an alcoholic, someone can use social media without becoming dependent on it. It's our job to be responsible and aware of the risks so that we don't overindulge in either. One system in place to help prevent overusing Instagram is a feature that can remind you to exit the app after a certain amount of time. However, it is up to each individual to set that if they'd like to lessen their screen time. And then, it is also up to them to close the app. It can be very challenging, but it is a choice we have to make.

Social media apps are absolutely exploitative, but so are ads and many other types of companies and brands. At the end of the day, it is our responsibility to take our lives into our own hands. Unfortunately, from my perspective, until enough people break the cycle of social media addiction, it will likely remain challenging to form meaningful, lasting connections in the real world.

About Me

     Hi there! My name is Caleb, though my nickname is "Slumpy" and many variations of it simply because I thought it was cute and silly back in middle school. I'm from a small town in Michigan but now travel all over the world, learning about different cultures and seeing different places. I've lived abroad before as well, and I'll be back in my second home, Taiwan, for a duration of this term. 

    I've actually taken quite a few communication-related courses before. Currently, I am studying Fisheries, Wildlife, and Conservation Science, but before, I was a Journalism student overseas. The program I was on focused heavily on new media and communication, so I learned a lot about communicating to consumers, through film, writing, and media industries. So, aside from being Gen Z and growing up with technology, I'm pretty familiar with new media and communicating through it; however, there's certainly always more to learn! I took my previous communication courses in Taiwan, so I'm curious to see if digital communication is different from a Western perspective.

    Some of my hobbies include traveling, writing, language learning, and all sorts of other assorted things. I like a variety of things, though! From crochet to making YouTube videos to researching marine life, I do a bit of everything. Whenever something piques my interest, I tend to just go for it!

    I deleted all social media for a while to stop my addiction to doom-scrolling and to clear my head. But recently I've made a new Instagram account. Otherwise, I have a YouTube channel where I post videos about travel, especially eco-friendly travel and traveling as a young adult. I haven't uploaded in a while due to my break from being online (and not knowing what to post), but I'll include a link in case anyone is interested: Slumpy Adventures YouTube Channel. Aside from those two platforms, I don't have any other public social media accounts (except this blog, now).

    My goal for this term is to learn more about communicating effectively and safely online. I've grown up with the internet but never took my digital footprint into consideration until getting a bit more mature. My aim is to learn how to present myself online in a way that avoids giving out too much information, how to protect my identity online, and how to deal with AI in the online-scape. Aside from my apprehension, I want to learn about how to reach people and be more connected in the digital scape. It's our reality and future, so learning how to safely be present in this space and utilize it to its full capacity is vital.